White People: Even if We're Not Racist, We Can Do Better
Simple Ways to Fight Racism
First off, let me say that I’m not an authority on fighting racism and I’m aware that far more qualified activists, intellectuals, and writers have written more eloquent pieces on this topic. Neither my blog readership nor social media following are massive but there’s been enough interest in this topic that I wanted to create something my friends, followers, and family could use to help educate themselves and others. I’m going to start by delving into a few phrases and concepts that some people find scary or confusing (“anti-racist”, “defund the police”, and violent protesters) then I’ll get into some practical suggestions for what to do next.
Notice something that could be better explained or did I forget to include an important resource? Please drop a comment so I can add it in, or just leave your general thoughts on the piece or how you’re helping to fight racism.
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What does “anti-racist” mean
Some people are uncomfortable with this term because they don’t see themselves as racist. That’s fair. None of us want to be labeled as a racist and most of us aren’t consciously racist. If we knew we were being racist, we’d likely try to change our behavior. This Smithsonian article on Being Antiracist is a really great introduction to the concept. It’s an easy-to-read article that defines different terms, uses helpful graphics, and has short videos and TED Talks on the topic.
Professor and author Ibram X. Kendi explains how we are racist unless we are actively anti-racist: “All policies, ideas and people are either being racist or anti-racist. Racist policies yield racial inequity; anti-racist policies yield racial equity. Racist ideas suggest racial hierarchy, anti-racist ideas suggest racial equality. A racist is supporting racist policy or expressing a racist idea. An anti-racist is supporting anti-racist policy or expressing an anti-racist idea. A racist or anti-racist is not who we are, but what we are doing in the moment.”
I sort of think of it in terms of: if you’re not racist, you won’t say racist things but an anti-racist person will actively call out racism around them (btw, that links to a good video to watch). If you have no problem with people of color, you may not be racist, but to be anti-racist, you need to take action. For instance, you might spend money at minority-owned restaurants and businesses, vote and speak out against public policies that negatively impact people of color, encourage your employer to diversify your workplace, or donate to charities that support people of color. I donate to Black Lives Matter but if you’re not yet comfortable with that or you don’t yet fully understand what they do, you could donate to the United Negro College Fund, or to community centers in your city that are serving communities of color.
What About “Defund The Police”?
I’ll admit that the slogan “Defund the Police” is not great. It scares a lot of people and it’s also not completely accurate. The phrase is short and fits neatly onto a protest sign but few people are actually asking to abolish the police. Even Michael Moore (who conservatives love to hate) said that cops should be embraced and well-paid (another good video) and should be there for murder, rape, and burglaries. But many situations don’t require a person with a badge and a gun to arrive and their presence can escalate the situation.
The phrase “Defund the Police” has less to do with funding for law enforcement than it does with how governments spend taxpayer dollars. Community centers, education initiatives, job programs, and even access to better nutrition all contribute to safer communities. “Defund the Police” is requesting that tax payer dollars are shifted away from over-funded police departments (do they really need all that military-level gear and tanks?) and shifting it to other programs that are proven to reduce crime and improve the community without increasing tensions between cops and the communities they patrol. For instance, Eugene, Oregon sends a trained mental health team to respond to mental health emergencies instead of sending police, who are not trained. According to a two-time Afghanistan war veteran with 17 years of experience handling military weapons in the US NAVY, “most police departments don’t have the experience and level of training needed to operate this equipment properly, which is a waste of our public dollars.”
In 2013, Camden New Jersey did something similar, dissolving the existing police force and re-building it from scratch. Their murder rate was 18 times the national average so they needed a change. Every police officer was fired, then had to re-apply with a 50-page application, take a new physical, and psych evaluation. The new police force restructured the reward system and trained cops to be guardians and protectors instead of enforcers. They also changed the performance metrics system so that cops weren’t evaluated by the number of arrests they made. Homicides and excessive force complaints have gone way down since 2013 and the former police chief in Camden said he would have happily “traded 10 cops for a Boys and Girls Club.”
Family-friendly protest in Manhattan
Peaceful protest on Brooklyn Bridge
White Boys for Black Lives
Aren’t These Protesters Violent?
No, they’re not. Sure, there was some vandalism of stores - I witnessed it in New York City - but it ended relatively quickly. The looting (and the curfew) ended after a few days, yet I saw some news outlets (I’m looking at you, Fox News!) continue to show footage of looting on their station that was 5 days old instead of showing the massive peaceful protests. Yes, I watch Fox News. I often find it insufferable since many of its commentators are spouting racially-charged opinions that are not substantiated with facts, but I think it’s important to consume media from different outlets to ensure you see all perspectives. I also want to know what diehard Trump fans are seeing since this forms their perspective.
Anyway, protests are largely peaceful. How do I know? Because I’ve been attending several protests every week, sometimes for 8 hours at a time. Every single race shows up and many parents bring their kids (Side note - if you bring your kids, make sure they have kid’s face masks!). Even the Republican senator, Mitt Romney, marched with a Christian group at DC protests. They’re family-friendly, peaceful protests.
Regarding the looting (which I condemn), if you’re going to use it as an excuse to not support protests, at least consider why some people felt the need to loot. Maybe they are so fed up with how they and their family have been treated by law enforcement that this pent up rage resulted in some very unfortunate and unproductive behavior. Perhaps they just lost their job and need to feed their family. Perhaps they’re just some jackass kids trying to cause trouble or maybe they were racist extremists trying to make peaceful protesters look bad.
All these theories have been put out there but the looting and the motivation of the looters should have no impact on how you view the peaceful protests. Are you really going to be that person that “would have supported black lives but then someone broke into a sneaker shop”? I hope not. Black lives matter, we have the right to peacefully protest, and racist, violent police should be held accountable regardless of whether or not a few bad apples smashed windows and took sneakers.
While we’re on the topic of looting, I’ll also encourage you to consider how the media actively refers to blacks as “looters” and whites as “finding supplies”. This came up a lot during Hurricane Katrina and other disasters.
Racism is as American as Apple Pie
Systemic racism is baked into America so as a white person, I sometimes don’t see it. Though I grew up with mostly black friends and have spent years listening and learning, I still have plenty of blind spots and lots of work to do on myself.
As a woman, I’ve experienced overt and covert acts of sexism throughout my entire life. Every single woman knows what sexism is and has experienced it even if well-meaning men don't see it. Racism is similar in that, as a white person, I may not experience it directly, and I might not always notice that it’s happening, but it still exists and I want to do a better job of stopping it.
The terms white privilege and white supremacy culture might make you feel uncomfortable and I totally get that. Nobody wants to be labeled a racist and very few people consider themselves racist, yet racist acts (and violent attacks) happen every single day. No one is born racist or anti-racist, these result from the choices we make.
My friend, colleague, and client, Jen Bokoff wrote a fantastic essay on her blog, the Jeneralist, about own experience learning about her own white privilege and how to become an anti-racist ally. She also put together a great list of lists that she gave me permission to share here. However, the lists will only be relevant to you understand some key terms. She suggests reading White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack by Peggy McIntosh and The Characteristics of White Supremacy Culture as excerpted from Dismantling Racism: A Workbook for Social Change Groups by Kenneth Jones and Tema Okun. The pieces are short and powerful . As you read them, Jen encourage you to '“not try to ‘solve’ your whiteness, but to sit with it and reflect on how it has affected your presence in the world.”
How-to Guides
The 13 lists (from the Jeneralist) are authored by different experts and will break down a variety of ways to learn about and show up as an antiracist in this world.
Stop Killing Us: A Real Life Nightmare – an article (with a list embedded) by Tamika Butler
Anti-racism resources for white people – a mega-document of resources compiled by Sarah Sophie Flicker and Alyssa Klein
6 Ways to Activate Beyond Social Media – an instagram list by @jezzchung
Mapping Our Roles in a Social Change Ecosystem – an instagram list shared by @terisasiagatonu and created by Deepa Iyer
5 Ways To Take Action For All Non-Black People – an instagram list developed by @theconsciouskid
Shareable Anti-racism Resource Guide – compiled by Tasha Ryals
26 Ways To Be In The Struggle Beyond The Streets – shared by Racial Justice Rising
Raising engaged anti-racist children – a twitter thread by @thecathyshow including resources from many terrific organizations
A World Of Activism: How You Can Get Involved – a list by the Cultures of Resistance Network
75 Things White People Can Do For Racial Justice – a list compiled by Connie Shutack
6 ways to be antiracist, because being ‘not racist’ isn’t enough – an article by Rebecca Ruiz featuring Ibram X. Kendi’s thinking
10 Simple Ways White People Can Step Up to Fight Everyday Racism – a list compiled by @privtoprog, via the #ShowUp movement
How To Be Actively Antiracist – a list compiled by @goodgoodgoodco on instagram that draws from many brilliant writers and activists
Books, Videos, and Movies
There’s a lot of helpful lists going around on social media about what to read, watch, and listen to. Watching a movie and reading a book won’t dismantle racism overnight but it’s a good place to start.
Videos
Uncomfortable Conversations with a Black Man - great new video series with Fox Sports analyst and former NFL player, Emmanuel Acho.
How to Overcome our Biases TED Talk with Verna Myers
Public Address on Revolution by the academic Rachel Cargle
Movies
Bustle created a great list of essential movies to watch about race so I’m not going to try to reinvent that wheel. Go read their list and watch those movies.
Paramount is allowing free streaming of the films Just Mercy about the true story of a lawyer fighting for justice (book of the same name, by the film’s protagonist, is included below) and also Selma, which chronicles the tumultuous three-month period in 1965, when Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. led a dangerous campaign to secure equal voting rights in the face of violent opposition.
Netflix created a “More than a Moment” collection that highlights films directed by and/or featuring African-Americans. Some are thought-provoking documentaries, others are goofy TV shows or comedy specials. Here’s a few that I’ve watched or re-watched recently and recommend:
13th by Ava DuVernay is a documentary where scholars, activists, politicians (and even Newt Gingrich!) analyze the criminalization of blacks and the US prison boom.
Self Made, a film inspired by the true story of Madam C.J. Walker, the first self-made female millionare in the US, who happened to be black.
Becoming looks at the life of former first lady, Michelle Obama.
Books
Amazon is kind of a terrible company (btw, that’s a hilarious and super informative video) but so many people have accounts there so I’m including Amazon links here. That said, I hope you order these books from your local bookstore (many bookstores are still shipping orders even if they haven’t re-opened yet).
How to Be An Antiracist by Ibram X. Kendi
White Fragility by Robin Diangelo
So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo
Me and White Supremacy by Layla F. Saad
The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander
Women Race & Class by Angela Davis
Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson
Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates
Eloquent Rage: A Black Feminist Discovers Her Superpower by Brittany Cooper
Reproductive Injustice: Racism, Pregnancy, and Premature Birth by Dána-Ain Davis
When They Call You A Terrorist by Patrisse Khan-Cullors (a founder of the Black Lives Matter movement) and Asha Bandele
Reaching out to Black Friends
Some people are encouraging white people to reach out to their black friends to check up on them but some black people say it’s emotionally draining to have white people all-of-a-sudden come to them and ask them to teach them what to do right now. They’re right. That’s not their job. First, we need to educate ourselves. Also, if we have a black “friend” from work that we never talk to outside of work, or a casual acquaintance that we haven’t text in a year, now is not the time to write them and pretend to stand in solidarity with them. Where were you before?
Here’s a fantastic piece by a black author that declared “I Don’t Need ‘Love Texts’ From My White Friends.” He felt that many of the texts weren’t intended to show love, but rather, they served as a way for white people to unload their white guilt onto him. Also check out this article “White People, Read This Before You Text Your Black Friends.” The author says that “Inadvertently, the black person becomes a therapist, exonerating their white friend from their guilt” and “I am aching and deeply sad, but I should not be the main subject of those sympathies.”
If you don’t have any black friends, perhaps you don’t have anyone to check in on in the first place. Then, what do you do? Well, why not check in with your white friends and start talking about how you can educate yourselves on racism and speak out against oppression. Maybe even send them this blog post. :) I’ve also heard from white people who live in rural, all-white areas who don’t know any black people. They’ve told me they’re actively following black artists, thinkers, and influencers on social media to make sure they’re exposed to diverse perspectives. One woman who works in education told me she is going to look into organizations dedicated to decreasing the racial gap in education. Even if everyone in her own community is 100% white, she can still financially support and get active with these groups online.
Teaching Your Kids to Be Anti-Racist
I’m not a parent so I’m not about to pretend I’m an authority on this, but my mom did a fantastic job on this department so I want to share some of the things I remember her doing when I was a kid. Also, did you see my link above to the Twitter thread about raising anti-racist kids that links to a bunch of resources?
Introduce Your Kids to Diversity
In addition to restricting our television programming to educational programs with diverse actors (shout out to PBS!) my mom actively chose books for us to read that represented just about every type of person. We read about the lives of Native American women and about children of different ethnicities and abilities. I recall reading stories about groups of friends that included kids that looked like me but that also included kids of different races and kids who were blind or in a wheelchair. She taught us at an early age that these kids were just like us so when we encountered someone in real life that might look a bit different, we didn’t harbor any fear or judgement. Through our books, we kind of already knew these kids and we knew they were just like us.
Don’t Define People by Race
My mother made a point of referring to someone in the crowd, on TV, or in a book by describing their hairstyle or the color of their clothing. Instead of a saying “that black boy”, she’d say “the boy in the red shirt”, and instead of “that Asian girl”, she’d say “the girl with the ponytail.” She’d do the same with kids of different abilities. Instead of saying “the boy in the wheelchair”, he’d be “the boy with the green hat”.
I recently asked my mom why she did this. Her response (which is elaborated more in the comments below) was: "I think it was part of our mindset as whites to create a divide between “us” and “them” so I wanted to prepare you to not categorize people by race in other situations. I wanted you to know there’s other ways to divide people that don’t refer to race.”
Surround Your Kids Diversity
My parents sent us to a Spanish Immersion elementary school that happened to be majority black. They wanted us to learn another language and have friends from all different backgrounds. While this may not be an option for everyone out there, my mom had a few other strategies that might be more applicable.
When we moved to the suburbs, most of my friends lived on the other side of town (in Milwaukee, consistently identified as the most segregated city in the country, the north side is the “black area.”) My mom was not afraid to let me hang out with my friends in this area and she frequently drove me there to spend the night. If my friends’ parents didn’t have a car or couldn’t drive all the way by us, she would drive to pick them up to bring them over, then drive them back home. (She also went to work late many times so she could stand in line to buy me tickets to R&B and rap concerts, which she wasn’t afraid to send me to. My mom was great).
For several years, my sister has enrolled my nephew (whose father is Mexican) in ecology camps and classes on the other side of town because she wants him to be around and be taught by people who don’t look like him. She’s also enrolling her daughter in Mexican dance classes in “the Mexican” area (near south side) to help preserve and learn about her culture, something that’s very difficult to do in the all-white neighborhood they live in.
Surrounding your kids with diversity takes some effort, especially if you live in an all white neighborhood full of all white schools, but it may be your only option.
How We Use Our Time
This post took me about five hours to write. I spent at least that long watching Law & Order SVU re-runs last Saturday night and every Saturday night since the pandemic started. Sure, I went out to protest for a few hours that day, but was binge watching TV for the 50th day in a row really the best use of my time? I think not. We may not all be able to go protest every day, but, can we spend an hour a day reading and sharing these resources or emailing our elected officials to demand justice? Yes, I think we can.
What Did I Miss?
Did you enjoy the post? If so, please share.
Did I miss something? I’m certain I did. Please drop a comment below with suggestions for topics or resources to add here, or to share a story about how you’ve been addressing racism.